Oh for a hole when it gets monstrous like this,
allow me to melt away,
to forward my existence
to less unsettling times
and in shadow revel in this joke-
that life should never be so kind!
For all I would wish to disappear,
but more that I’d yearn to unleash
this torrent of bubbling hysterics
to find in that way a better end-
a gutter to lie in,
to laugh while I’m dyin’,
to see it for what it is-
oh beautiful hell,
I had forgotten.